Giving back the same energy

Photo by Jessie McCall on Unsplash

This female celebrity, who I never liked eversince, is in the news again for smearing the icing of her birthday cake to a server.

I’m really not into this cancel culture but can we please teach her a lesson this time?

I don’t tolerate disrespect especially when it comes to service people as they are not paid enough to be treated rudely. How would anyone feel if the server is your brother, father, friend or boyfriend and you saw him being laughed at after this celebrity smeared chocolate icing on his face?

And what pains me every time something like this happens, is how the server can’t do anything out of fear of getting fired. In this case he just stood there, surprised, kept a straight face, unable to do anything.

I’ve never worked as a server, but I empathize with them because I have worked in customer service and have my fair share of irate customers and guests and their unreasonable demands and verbal abuse.  It’s hard enough for service people to earn a decent living, but for other people to make it harder for them by treating them rudely when they are just simply doing their jobs is just too much.

I have a degree in Business Administration Major in Marketing, but I never believed in the saying “Customer is King”. I remember rolling my eyes in class when my teacher was discussing this during one of our sessions. Take note that this was the early-to-mid `90s, but even then, I felt that the saying is so dated. “The customer is always right”-slogan is so turn-of-the-century. There’s nothing wrong in giving customer a quality customer service, but not at the expense of the customer service people. Being too customer-centric means that you don’t support your own people. When I was still a phone agent dealing with hotel guests, I hate it when my manager would throw me under the bus and side with an unreasonable guest and give them what they want despite all my best efforts.

I usually mind my own business and avoid social interactions, but I am also that type of person that would stand up for a service person at any given time. There’s something about it that triggers me to do something and not just stand there and watch the abuse and feel sorry for the service person. I will not hesitate to call out a customer acting like an entitled toddler and disrespecting a service employee. In some instances, I end up arguing with them.  

If you are on the other side of this as a customer, always make sure that what you’re asking for is reasonable to begin with. Be kind with your words. Remember that you merely paid for the service, but not for the other person’s dignity. If you are a bit inconvenienced, it’s okay to let them know but make it a point that you’d still be courteous or at the least, civil. No matter how high you think of yourself,  you are not, in any way, above them. 

Never, ever make fun of them for a good laugh. This is so common these days because a lot are making careers out of the internet by playing pranks. I’ve seen this Tiktok video of a drive-thru girl who threw a drink to the customer after the driver loudly beeps the car’s horn at her. I say that is deserved.

I really believe we should normalize service people giving back the same energy, whether it’s negative or positive, that a customer is giving them. I also think that we should not just stand and watch when we see things like this. Our inaction is enabling these people to keep doing it.

What is luxury?

Photo by Ivan Kazlouskij on Unsplash

Just recently, I read about the Singapore-based Filipina girl who was bashed by netizens on Tiktok after calling Charles & Keith a “luxury bag”.

On her follow-up video, she calmly responded to the “Who’s gonna tell her?”-comment that she considers Charles & Keith “luxury” because growing up she did not have a lot.

I can’t with these awful netizens who are probably just so bored in their lives to shame this girl. FCOL, she was just excited to show on video acquiring a bag that for her, is already a luxury. Why can’t they let her be?

I am not a fan of designer handbags. Never was. Even now that I have been working more than half of my life, I just don’t see the need or the fascination over it, to be honest. 

But before you attack me, I absolutely have no hate for people who own luxury bags. It’s definitely not their fault that they can afford it. But there are some who think that owning such designer pieces define them and make them feel like they’re better people than others. What a shame, really.

I’m already in my late forties, but the only branded bags I ever owned are the likes of Hedgren, Charles & Keith, Calvin Klein, Tommy Hilfiger, Lacoste and a classic Coach I got second-hand. Even now, I can’t even get a Kate Spade bag because I feel I can buy a lot of other things with its price. Notice I don’t have an LV, Hermes, Gucci, YSL, Prada or Chanel — what most people would classify as “luxury”.

I am not an expert on the topic, so I will not even pretend that I am, but what would be the price range to consider a bag as a “luxury brand”? Or can one argue that the word “luxury” is subjective? 

When I think of luxury brand bags and purses, generally, I think of the ones that retails for a certain price range (perhaps between $900 – higher). 

Personally, I define “luxury” based on my own buying/purchasing power. If I worked hard enough to own one (like I had to get it by layaway or installment plan), then I consider it a luxury item. According to Merriam-Webster, luxury is “a condition of abundance or great ease and comfort”. So the harder it is for me to acquire something, the more I consider it a luxury.

While I understand that the meaning of it is different from people-to-people, I still think it’s unnecessary to call out this teen over some “technicality” or semantics. But if some are still so worked up about it, notice how the caption on her Tiktok video says: “My first luxury bag”, not even “My first luxury brand bag”. Obviously, she’s speaking in her own POV on what luxury is.

Anyway, something good came out of it. The girl was invited by the Charles & Keith founders for lunch and a tour in its headquarters. Now, that’s a win.

Also, this is what I’ve been saying over and over again. We shouldn’t normalize shaming a person in his or her own post unless the person is asking for it (meaning the post’s purpose is to stir controversy or provoke criticisms, etc). If you don’t like what you see, skip.

Not that fun anymore

Some knew me as the Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU) fangirl. I am. Or was.

I would be the first to admit that I was not familiar with Marvel comics in general. I got to know Iron Man, Thor, Doctor Strange, etc. only from the movies. Growing up I was more familiar with the DC characters like Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman, as they were the first to go in mainstream movies and TV shows back in the day. As a child, I would imitate Lynda Carter by stretching both arms and turning around to transform to Wonder Woman. I would have bullet-deflecting bracelets made of cigarette foils and use my father’s belt as my golden lasso. Pre-MCU, when you ask me who my favorite superhero was, I’d tell you faster-than-a-speeding-bullet that it’s Superman. I have watched the character immortalized by the late Christopher Reeve about a hundred times that I can already recite the lines while watching it. If you ask me who comes in second, I’d probably tell you Batman of the Michael Keaton-era.   

But all that changed when I first saw Iron Man. I always thought RDJ playing the genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist was just downright amazing. The movie jumpstarted every movie following it and the rest, as they say, is history. We got the greatest superhero franchise we’ve ever seen.

So much so that my love for MCU eclipsed my love for another sci-fi franchise, Star Wars. When MCU was at its peak, I would watch a movie twice or thrice in cinemas and more times at home. The entire run from Iron Man in 2008 to the climactic Endgame in 2019, I was all invested.

But here’s a controversial personal opinion: MCU movies and TV series after Endgame, with the exception of Spiderman: No Way Home, SUCKS.

I know this would be subject for contention especially to comic book fans who are now probably itching to educate me on how much of what’s happening is based on the comics anyway and how I should not even comment if I wasn’t a fan of it from the very beginning. 

Comic-book gatekeeping aside, you got to hear me out.

Since Marvel was acquired by Disney, I felt that MCU since Phase Four became too woke, too inclusive, and with too many agendas. And the thing that ticks me off big time was how most of the remaining male heroes I’ve grown to love were emasculated. Now before you tell me I’m being racist, sexist or bigoted, or have prejudices against people of color or the those belonging to the LGBTQ, allow me to explain this further.

Was there a pressure for the people writing these new shows and movies to insert an empowered woman in the story? Was it really necessary? I was able to watch the Loki TV series from some free movie online streaming service (not Disney+) and I can tell you that I was so disappointed. I was hoping to see more of Loki, the god of mischief, wonderfully played by Tom Hiddleston, but instead I was given Sylvie, the female version of Loki who is much stronger, wiser and made Loki somewhat laughable. The Hawkeye series is the same, as it wasn’t even about Clint Barton as Hawkeye, but about Kate Bishop. Then there’s Dr. Strange in The Multiverse of Madness being sidelined by another empowered woman, America Chavez.

Don’t get me started about She-Hulk. I have so much to say about this series but I’d rather not as I don’t want to sound just bashing the show.

Being a woman, I have no problems if they insert a woman hero in the bunch. I loved Black Widow and Captain Marvel, and both held their own around the other male Avengers. My issue with Phase Four with all this M-She-U going on is why would it be at the expense of the beloved, established male heroes?  

I guess this is the reason why I didn’t enjoy Thor: Love and Thunder at all. That’s almost surprising, since I loved the other Thor movies and I love the character, period. But really? Jane being able to wield the Mjolnir and be the Mighty Thor that easy? It’s almost too forced.

When you think about it, the lady heroes had no sort of progression or years of training. They just became heroes in a snap when the male heroes before them had story arcs that went on for years! And now these women heroes who had very short training and only a brief moment of confidence and validation are now better and stronger than the male heroes? All too easy, rushed and convenient if you ask me. There’s no good storytelling. Have you seen how Kate Bishop, armed with no more than but years of competitive training in archery, fencing and martial arts—took out Tracksuit mafias?

Another issue I have is how they make sure that the movie has to be ethnically diverse. It has to be. I didn’t bother watching Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings, but it had nothing to do with it having East Asian characters, but it’s just doesn’t have the same appeal. I enjoyed the first Black Panther where there is almost an all-Black cast, so I don’t think I have a racial prejudice.  

Meanwhile, Eternals for me, which I paid good money to watch in theaters, was a snoozefest. Even if superstar Angelina Jolie was there, it didn’t help that it has an overcomplicated plot. Most of the characters are forgettable. I can’t even remember the plot off the top of my head. But I was very forgiving, when I stepped out of the theater, I shrugged it off as Marvel getting to be more about mythological/celestials characters now and not superheroes.

And while I feel representation is important, I just feel some insertions of LGBTQ characters is unnecessary, really. You can call me a bigot for saying so but sometimes I feel that it’s just forced to please that sector of the society. If for anything it’s patronizing. Phase Four MCU had too many woke agendas that it has become dizzying and problematic. They seem to be all too worried about politics, identity representation and diversity that none of them stopped and asked if this is what the fans wanted. 

I read somewhere that Stan Lee, while he knew he had to try to get social issues in his films, he made sure that it’s not to the point of interfering with the story already. I wish they followed through with this instead of pushing way too much political agenda. There’s no more focus on the storytelling.

This is why I feel that Spiderman: No Way Home did well in the box-office and got good reviews is because it doesn’t have any agenda. Sure, the major criticism about it is that it played with nostalgia with Tobey and Andrew coming back with all the other Spiderman villains but at least there is no hidden political agenda to it. It’s just basically bringing us back to the real Peter Parker who’s a broke orphan do-gooder.

But the thing I absolutely hate about Phase Four was how they emasculated the male superheroes. Thank goodness, Iron Man and Captain America are no longer around and won’t be treated like this anymore, but I felt this very much on how they treated Thor’s character in Thor: Love and Thunder and Hulk in She-Hulk. Like the men should act stupid so that women empowerment can be celebrated.   

Thor: Love and Thunder hurts my fangirl heart. How can Marvel give us Thor: Ragnarok (the best) and Thor in Avengers: Infinity War (where he awaken the dying neutron star Nidavellir) into a laughing stock with giant screaming goats?

And because of this, after a decade, I haven’t had the same urge to watch MCU movies and TV series. I watched Black Panther: Wakanda Forever a month after it was released, just because I got bored walking in the mall one afternoon and thought to kill time inside the movie theater instead. A far cry to when I will watch an MCU movie a day or two upon its release. The thrill is no longer there. I’ve grown apathetic that it no longer thrills me to hear the new line up. With Disney stepping in, I feel it has become more of quantity than quality. I have felt the same thing when Disney acquired Star Wars and made the next three movies. My unpopular opinion will always be that Star Wars should have ended in Episode 6. Just because there are so many characters in the Marvel comics, do you really have to make a movie about them no matter how obscured they were? Now we are left with this influx of characters that even I can’t keep track all.

Besides, where are we going with this entire Multiverse thingy? My kuya said having the multiverse in the narrative is only to make sure beloved characters can still do cameos and sometimes I think he’s right. Believe it or not, fans can sniff that, Mr. Feige. We know when our love for the previous films is being exploited already.   

Did you know that the first three phases (Infinity Saga as it is called) runs for 50 hours across 23 movies and Phase Four alone, with the movies and TV series, already has more than 60 hours of content? It has become a Marvel Film Factory and fans are getting tired of it. I used to hate it when I had to wait for the next MCU movie but now I realized that it gave more thrill and excitement when fans are anticipating it. I miss that feeling. 

I’m so disillusioned and frustrated with what I have seen so far after Endgame. So yes, if Marvel continues to go to this track of self-destruction then I’m not coming in for the ride. 

Hey, 2023.

And just like that, holidays are over. We are thrown back to our normal routine prior to the happy, jolly Christmas revelry. I am currently nursing a cold, fever and a slight cough—reeking of Tiger Balm all over—but otherwise I’m okay.

New Year’s Eve salubong was just alright, a little less fun compared to the previous ones. In the last three years, we have had several deaths in the family, but we try to carry on with our tradition to stay awake until midnight and just wait for the changing of the year. 

A residential area like ours can be big when it comes to firecrackers and cacophony of loud noises (motorcycle revving is what I absolutely hate), but I noticed that fireworks display this year are not that many. I say inflation hits even the usual holiday celebration. 

At least in our family, we were never big on the Noche Buena and Media Noche eversince. We don’t really have a feast like other households even if my mom cooks a lot of food enough to clog our arteries for a whole week. We just don’t do a big table set-up and have our pictures taken like other families. It was never our tradition to eat together during the holidays. Most of the time, we just do the salubong, then help ourselves with whatever it is we want to eat, then go to sleep.

I have no New Year’s resolution this year, judging my history of failing to fulfill most of it. But I will continue to hold that hope that this year will be better for me and my loved-ones, especially health-wise.   

I tried catching some z’s the next day, January 1, having no other plans in the morning. My nephews had to leave to be with their mother’s side of the family in Binangonan, so it’ll just be me, mom, and my brothers at home for two days. 

By noon, I’m already preparing to go to mass as it’s the First Sunday of the year. After that I went to the mall but forgot that most of the stores are closed on New Year’s Day. I don’t think I can go on a shopping extravaganza anyway when I’m broke since Christmas (painfully waiting for next payday), so as usual I just treated myself a plate of pasta, dropped by a nearby drugstore to buy my personal essentials and go straight home. 

In the previous years, my cousins and I would go bowling during New Year’s Day but not for this year. Everyone seems to have their own plans so nothing had panned out. We have to accept that succeeding holidays will be like this so it’s best to plan things within the family without having to involve others. Besides, if I may be candid about it, the past year’s holidays became a wake-up call for me and my older brother. In many instances this year, purposely or not, our family was left out on some gatherings and events. But instead of ruminating what we did wrong, we just didn’t mind it that much anymore. 

January 2nd was declared a holiday so I jumped on that chance to go to RCBC Plaza to drop off the calendars to a friend and do some window shopping after. I have no leaves for the whole month after this because the office made some revisions where leave credits will be earned at the end instead of the beginning of the month. I am saving my carry-over leaves from 2022 for the leave encashment on the 25th (unused leaves of the previous year will be converted to cash) so my next leave won’t be until February. 

By this time, I already felt that I was coming down with something so I spent the rest of the day in bed. Hopefully this isn’t COVID, but I don’t think it is because my symptoms are mild compared to when I had it also at the beginning of last year. 

I hope this is not a sneak preview of my 2023. Oh, hell no.