If you are in my story

Everyone has a story to tell, and I think through this blog I have already shared some of mine. I've always wanted to write a light-hearted novel loosely based on my life but I never had the right “push” and the time for it. I thought that maybe now that I’m not working full-time, I can start.

Maybe.

I am a naturally-born storyteller. I remember how I can narrate episodes of The Twilight Zone or some adult American TV series to my playmates (who do not own a television) with such ease even if the plot is quite complex. Somehow, I know how to hold the interest of people listening to me. As I got older and talking to other people is not one of my most favorite things to do anymore, I tell my stories through my writing.

The tricky thing about telling my story in print and why I have never started is how I would have to bring some key players into it. And the reality of that is if I mention some of them, it might not be in a flattering light. 

American novelist and non-fiction writer Anne Lamott quoted: “You own everything that happened to you. Tell your stories. If people wanted you to write warmly about them, they should have behaved better.” 

I couldn’t help but chuckle when I first saw this quote because I’m sure a lot of people I know wouldn’t want to be a part of my narrative if I believed this 100%. An unhealthy relationship whether it’s with family, relatives, friends, and exes is something we all have. Retelling my story might not be good for some people who may have been a part of my life, as it will reveal a lot about their behavior towards me. If they were portrayed negatively, I’m sure they would feel a sense of shame once I out them.

I had this problem in all my years of blogging; how there were people who offended me in one way and didn’t take kindly what I wrote about them. Many of them had policed my work. Take note, I don’t even refer to them by name, but they’d still react as if I have no right to even mention them even if they were actually part of the tale I’m telling.

There’s another saying that one should not write about the people they once loved because it will only be told from the narrator’s perspective. But if I do write a story about me, I would only have to speak of the truth. And while I will definitely not eviscerate anyone in print, I also have to be honest in telling stories about my relationships. I have my mistakes, they have theirs—so all’s fair. My intention is never to demonize but more to understand why things happen. I don’t want to hurt other people’s feelings for the sake of readership, and I’m certainly not gonna write about them only to get even. 

Being genuine is the best way to make a connection with my readers. Although, with respect to Lamott, I still believe that writing about other people must be treated with respect as I do not have the carte blanche to bare it all. While they are part of MY story, they are NOT the story. I believe that there are things that happened between us that are too personal to even share with other people. Frankly, it’s something that a previous oversharer like me regret. 

Perhaps that will be the reason why I’d probably fritter away the time and won’t be able to write a memoir for I honestly don’t know how to go about it. I’m a very emotional person and I tend to get carried away especially if I’m describing someone who hurt me. I might tell you about their debauchery and what not. If I do that then I will be contradicting myself.