Keeping myself occupied

With the TV in my room nearing its end, I spend most of my time these days wallowing in YouTube videos on my cellphone or laptop. I’ve just discovered Jaime French, who is not your typical makeup artist because she’s hilarious and is just fun to watch (check out her Makeup & Movies and spoofs like “If beauty YouTubers existed in 1999”). I like it when a beauty vlogger has real girl problems and doesn’t take herself way too seriously. Jaime injects humor in the process which makes her videos not boring to watch at all. 

A local counterpart I can say would be Letisha Velasco, who is all-too-funny you’d think she’s just carelessly piling makeup on her face but wait till you see her transformation. Pure talent and skill, that girl.

Photo from Pixabay

While many are spending their time on lockdown doing urban gardening or baking, I spent mine watching a lot of makeup videos—however ditzy that sounds. Even if I’ve never been a big fan of makeup and could live with just an everyday drugstore foundation, powder, eyebrow pencil, and lipstick, I’m actually enjoying it lately. I have only respect for these makeup artists; it only makes sense to use their creativity in a positive way like in a form of self-care.

I grew up in a time when applying makeup is only for special occasions or going to work and not when you only have to leave the house. I use my mom’s makeup (Kokuryu!) or once in a while receive Clinique makeup gift sets from balikbayan relatives (which I think was cool then but when you think about it I can only use like two or three products from it). When I wasn’t earning my own money yet, mommy would buy me Avon lipsticks and powder when she could, with colors and formulations that don’t suit me. For this reason, how I look on school programs and even on special occasions such as some friend’s debut or on my very own college graduation were quite a disaster. I’ve been guilty of every makeup faux pas there is with pictures to boot. 

At my age, my knowledge of makeup, in general, is amateurish. I’ve seen videos of people doing it (and they make it look easy) but I’ve never tried anything fancy such as highlights, bronzer, or contouring. I don’t even invest in beauty blenders or brushes because I got so used to using my fingers or sponges that come with the product. I’m quite a scrooge; I tend to shy away if something costs more than 700 pesos a pop.

I believe, just like cooking, baking, or gardening—it’s a skill that I don’t have and probably won’t even be good at. My face has so many issues that even a seasoned makeup artist would have a hard time going around with. I have hooded eyes and would tear up easily (thanks to my mild exophthalmos), a very oily T-zone, dark circles, uneven skin tone, some acne/chicken pox scars, etc. 

I remember attending a free makeup class sponsored by the office a few years ago. The makeup artist took one look at me and said, “Your eyes are big. We can’t do that much eye makeup on you,” and honestly it hit me hard. If only it wouldn’t be such in bad taste, I’d say, “Why the hell not? If you’re really that good you can work around with it.” 

Since then my interest in makeup had dwindled a bit. 

But boredom hits us more when you’re living through a pandemic. You’ll just find yourself looking for something—anything! — that can occupy your time. It beats me as to why, of all the other hobbies I can try, I decided to dab on makeup but, whatever.

I’d like to think that this renewed interest on makeup is a win-win situation. See, I spent the past year neglecting myself. Just because I don’t go out as much as I used to (and when I do I have a face mask that covers my face), my skincare routine took a backseat. I thought: What cleansing? What exfoliating? I’m only home more than 70% of the time so why do I need to be pretty? But then self-care is not really about being pretty for other people to see, but more about feeling good about oneself. 

An eye-opener happened after staring at the mirror one day and noticed how my face turned for the worse. For one, my nasty double chin became an even nastier triple chin. The lines on the corners of my mouth became more apparent. The sagging is just…que horror! — like I aged 10 years in all those months on lockdown. I wouldn’t even take a selfie lying in bed because my face spreads sideways I end up looking like Stay Puft. It was then that I realized I have to do something about it. Fast.

Then again, I’m not one to pile makeup until I make sure my skin is in a good condition. You know how you got to have a good canvas first. So after doing research and watching beauty vloggers for weeks (and maybe Jamie nudge me to it), I decided to try the Mizon All-In-One Snail Repair Cream and Mizon Snail Repair Eye Cream. 

Look what you made me do, Jaime.

BTW, snail mucin is the rave on Korean products lately although it’s not really new. If you haven’t heard about this, snail mucin is snail excretion, which is known to moisturize the skin and aids in skin healing and rejuvenation. I get how that could be kinda slimy-yucky, but it is what it is. I’ve seen people having snail facials as in, live snails on the face. 

Also, I found out that they stress the snails for it to secrete the mucin (they use it as a way for them to protect themselves). So, if you are about cruelty-free ingredients I don’t think that this method of extraction would sit well with you. 

I started using it recently and TBH, I haven’t seen any results that blew me away except my skin is now more supple in the morning. Since it contains comedogenic ingredients, I only use Mizon snail cream on my problem areas like that spot between my eyebrows where my pores are huge and by the neck, under my eyes, and at the corners of my mouth. I would give it more time and if I don’t see any remarkable results, I will not repurchase and instead buy something else that would give me the same results (if not better) at a more affordable price tag. Yes — that’s my quick review.

For the rest of my face, I went back to using an Aloe Vera Soothing Gel to clean and moisturize my face before I sleep at night. I forgot how nice it feels especially if you keep the tub inside the fridge. I use that with my 24K Golden Pulse Facial Massager. Now I wake up to a better, glowing skin. I even feel a slight tightening on some parts. 

I also ordered this EMS face firming machine because the facial sagging is really bothering me. If I had to look at my mom as a reference, that’s her only facial skin problem. At 80, she doesn’t have very prominent wrinkles or crow’s feet but her cheeks are drooped. I’m up against genetics here. 

The machine was quite pricey, I admit, but I had to deal with this before it’s too late. I’m quite excited to get a hold of that one in a few days (it ships from overseas) because it’s the very instrument that facial spas use on skin tightening and then charge you a thousand pesos per session.

Since I’ll spend my downtimes practicing, I’ve also been buying makeup because I don’t even have any left to use (expired makeup is a no-no). This one took me some time as I need to make sure the ones I’d buy suits me. For the past two weeks, I’ve also hoarded skin creams, micellar water, cleansers, face mist, and blotting papers. I’ve been ordering beauty sponges and brushes online. These days, every time a delivery comes in and is for me, my kuya would rag: “Mommy! Si Vayie makeup na naman ang binili!”

Make no mistake, I ain’t saying that you can expect me to do makeup videos anytime soon. How can I even go public when just a few nights ago my nephew Liam saw me wearing a cooling face mask, that he even had to call his older brother downstairs just so they could both laugh at me. It’s really just going to be something I’ll do during my free time in the confines of my room to keep myself busy.

But probably, with practice, I’ll try putting on some when I leave the house, emphasizing more on eye makeup because that’s one thing I would like to learn. 

On a deeper note, hours of watching makeup videos for both local and foreign beauty vloggers have somehow helped me deal with my everyday anxieties. I mean, would you rather read about current events or dwell on things (and people) that stress you out than watch someone’s incredible makeover transformation? For me, it’s actually a very good distraction from overthinking. 

If this isn’t going anywhere for me after all the effort I put to it, then I should rethink that Netflix subscription already.