Whatever floats your boat

I can never be a bandwagoner. If for anything, I’m quite the opposite of that—almost impervious. I don’t find myself gravitating towards something that is ‘in’ or ‘popular’ just to have that feeling that I’m not missing out on it. You can’t expect me to like something only because everybody else does. I don’t do something primarily because other people are doing it. I’m the kind who leans to my own preference no matter how unpopular or obscure it is.

It’s not me being a curmudgeonly snob, but more like I’m not that easily influenced. If something ever piques my interest, you can be sure that outside factors almost had nothing to do with it. 

Like how I still don’t know anything about K-Pop, or have not watched a single episode of Game of Thrones to this day, or read any book from the Harry Potter series, or the fact that even if a lot of my friends are going “plantita”, I have not caved in. 

Sometimes I wonder that myself: Is there’s something wrong with me? Am I resistant to what’s popular just because I don’t want to be like all the rest? Then I realize it’s all overthinking; it’s not sheer arrogance or not wanting to conform, but more like being aware that it had to do with my own taste and inclination. It’s a matter of self-expression.

So, yeah. I may not be that person you’d like to sit with if you want to talk about Blackpink or BTS for example, not because I’ll sneer at or silently judge you, but only because I have nothing to contribute. A few weeks ago, we had this virtual event at work and had this game of naming the Asian celebrities, shows, and series. I realized that if my life depended on my knowledge of this, I’d be the first to die. 

I noticed that fans today are different; their fanaticism goes beyond average idolization. There’s definitely devotion and pure passion. Call it celebrity worship if you want, but it’s very common nowadays. Many K-Pop fans I know learned how to speak and write Korean, bought merchandise (which doesn’t come cheap, BTW), built shrines in their room, among many, many other things. 

I’m not saying there’s absolutely wrong or unhealthy about it. To each his own. If that thing makes them happy, why will I even burst their bubble?

When McDonald’s recently offered their BTS Meal (consists of 10 pcs. Chicken McNuggets with limited edition sauces in cajun and sweet chili, a medium Coca-Cola and medium fries, packed in BTS signature purple packaging), a lot of fans went absolutely nuts and lined up for it—many of my friends included. They posted pictures of them posing with the BTS meal with genuine smile on their faces.   

Photo credit @rigellereyes 

Some took their obsession several notches further. I’ve seen some posts where fans framed the paper packaging and came across listings online for the paper bag and sauce seal alone. I’ve even seen one where it is enshrined in an acrylic box. Again, that is too much for a non-fan like me, but for a super fan, it’s just how it is.

It’s not like I don’t totally get them. I have kept similar items as a remembrance or souvenir before— most found its way to my old scrapbook—but this is a whole new level for me. Sure, if it’s some Marvel or Star Wars-inspired packaging I would have bought the meal too, but not so much to the point of actually keeping it for posterity. But being a fan these days is like that. They have more creativity, money, and resources to do what they want. These days, fanaticism is almost always an escape. I find all of it intense and mind-blowing, I guess I will never fully understand the phenomenon simply because I’m just the wrong demographic.

But here’s what I know: I may not be a fan, and perhaps you won’t be able to convert me into one, but I will never be a hater either. I will never trash talk or make fun of them not only because that would be going against an “army” who are prepared to defend and protect their idols at all costs (they’d skin me alive), but because I respect a person’s preference however different from mine. 

When the BTS meal came out, a lot of non-fans expressed their disdain. Some Grab delivery drivers even commented homophobic slurs against the group. I have a Facebook friend, a non-fan who bought the BTS meal for the heck of it, posted it on his wall, and just commented on how there’s nothing special about it, how stupid it was, how he doesn’t understand the hype, etc. This move is something I will never understand; if you have an opinion (I never said you can’t have one), keep it to yourself. Do not volunteer it, especially not to a fan unless your actual intention for doing so is to incite a conflict.

My kuya was very much like this before. When we take a cab he’d sit shotgun, and start a topic (often about politics) and criticize whoever—not even thinking that the driver might have an opposing view. Or sometimes at an earshot of a fan, he’d make fun of some boyband implying they were gay. I would constantly remind him to shut up because there’s no need to volunteer his opinions on random people like they even care about what he thinks. I tell him that this kind of reasoning is what the younger generation hated about the boomers and us Gen X'ers. Thankfully, I think I have gotten through him because he no longer does this and is now more accepting and tactful. 

See, I also feel bad when people criticize what I like or question my actions as a fan. My boss once asked me why I watched Avengers: Endgame many times. “It’s not like the ending will change the next time you see it”, he said. It might seem benign teasing, but I was slightly offended. How come it’s okay for a guy who admits to have watched Game of Thrones countless times but is perplexed when I act upon my own object of devotion the same way? 

In the age of polarization, when there are always two contrasting groups on almost anything, letting people be is still the best practice.