One of my many favorite Christmas songs is Andy Williams’ “It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year”. It just brings out that undeniable holiday cheer that turns even this midlifer into a giddy nine-year-old. It’s been made popular in recent years through the Ellen DeGeneres’ segment “12 Days of Giveaways”.
The Christmas season in the Philippines, which starts as soon as we hit the -ber months, is something I anticipate the whole year. With the Christmas preps, holiday parties and get-togethers, shopping rush, gift-giving, and lots of food, it really makes it the most wonderful time of the year.
Until 2020.
For me at least, this year is by far the most depressing December ever; even more depressing than December the year my Daddy died. I lost in touch with the holidays that I didn’t even realize that it’s already Christmas next week if not for a work calendar reminder.
I’ve been putting off posting this blog as I don’t want to rain on anyone’s parade on a supposed happy season, but I realized I will just be expressing what many of us are feeling: That Christmas this year won’t be as joyful as our other Christmases.
There are so many things that have been so different this year and it just makes me gloomy no matter how hard I try not to.
First, I miss our office building. I miss the giant Christmas Trees, The Nativity crèche by the drop-off entrance, the decked corridors, and spending some of my hard-earned 13th-month pay at the Christmas Bazaar.
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| RCBC 2019 |
I miss watching the Ayala Triangle Lights and Sound Show with my nephews. How their eyes would glow at the magical spectacle featuring colorful, dancing lights while a medley of Christmas songs is being played.
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| Festival of Lights 2018 |
I miss the company and team Christmas parties. The only time I put in an effort to dress up because our holiday party has always been one of the highlights of my year.
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| Holiday Party 2019 |
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| Team Christmas Party 2019 |
Even for a self-confessed enochlophobe, I miss the bustling crowds going crazy on Midnight Madness mall sales and how people would squeeze themselves in tiangges to do their last-minute Christmas shopping (myself included).
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| Greenbelt Christmas 2019 |
I miss the noisy Christmas carolers outside dancing to the tune of some tacky but upbeat Sexbomb or Aegis Christmas song. Or kids who’d stop by our gate and go, “Sa Maybahay, ang aming bati…” with their makeshift drum made of empty milk cans and tambourine made of flattened bottle caps.
I miss how, almost every morning, a riot will ensue outside after rival teenage gangs attend the Simbang Gabi. When Daddy was still alive, he’d sit by the gate just to watch it and have a laugh at how stupid it was.
I miss getting a glimpse of the bright Christmas lights along Ayala Avenue. It would be so pretty and somewhat hypnotic that I’d choose to walk from Buendia to Makati Ave. even if I was so tired after a whole day’s work.
I will miss our hotel staycation and videoing my nephews while opening their presents. Frankly, this one is what stings me the most because I always wanted my nephews to have very good Christmas memories.
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| No hotel staycation this Christmas Day |
It seems that the Pandemic Holiday season is taking a devastating toll on many people, not just me. I have friends and family members expressing how Christmas this year is going to be bleak because the things they traditionally do like visiting family and relatives, having a staycation or out-of-town trips, partying with friends, etc. had to be postponed. With the threat of another COVID surge, this means most of us will be spending the holidays at home. It gives the phrase “I’ll Be Home for Christmas” a whole new meaning—and not in a good way.
Then there are those people I know who will have a lonelier Christmas this year because of the recent death of a family member or a friend. I can imagine how tougher it will be for some whose loved-ones had died from COVID. For some, it’s a sad Christmas because they lost their job.
Earlier this year, even when COVID has already caused the lockdown, none of us expected it will go on for this long. Most of us still hoped we can all go back to how things were somehow. But when September came, we knew that we are all in this for the long haul.
At home, we still put up our Christmas decorations just because we still want to “feel it”. I think we did it not even in anticipation for this year’s Christmas, but more of the memory of past Christmases. Our fascination with this season is what motivated us to do it.
The other night, we had a virtual event with the Senior Leadership Team of our center which was like some sort of a meet for the holidays. They even tried to make it exciting by having an online raffle and a more laidback Q & A. But while I appreciate all the efforts of the people behind it, attending it made me sadder because it was not quite the same. Virtual meet certainly does not work for me but I guess that’s better than nothing.
We are skipping the festivities this year, that’s for sure. The government has issued a directive about holding any party and how partygoers may be arrested. I’m not sure if this will include Christmas dinners with family and relatives (especially that we’re a big family) so I don’t really know how we’d get to spend it. I have been reading articles on how to celebrate Christmas at home so maybe I’ll just give some of these suggestions a try.
Make no mistake, I know these COVID restrictions are important and I’m not in any way questioning why safety protocols had to remain in place even for this season, but you got to admit it’s depressing. When this comes to pass we’ll wait again for next year’s, hoping it will be better.
The problem with this pandemic is, nothing is certain. Should we brace ourselves for a similar lackluster Christmas in the future? I hope not.
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