My Christmas Wishlist (2021 Edition)

Photo by Juliana Malta on Unsplash

Today marks the beginning of the -ber months and for Filipinos, the countdown to Christmas starts now. 

This is the time of the year when I get excited looking forward to my favorite season. Yes, even at my age and even in the midst of this unprecedented pandemic, I’m still excited for Christmas. I like how even in the most depressing of times, the thought of celebrating another one still brings hope and joy for me. 

Guilty Feels

Photo by Pickawood on Unsplash

I believe that materialism will never replace the joy you get from something like having a happy time with your family, watching movies with friends, talking to your boyfriend, going out for dinner with girlfriends, etc. But because we’re waiting out a pandemic and it has been affecting our mental health and overall well-being; I’m constantly looking out for ways to fight the funk. 

Lately, I enjoy getting things for myself and have been spending most of my idle hours just browsing online shopping websites. I haven’t bought any big-ticket items yet but I have a lot on my cart waiting to be ordered. Anything from shelves, glass jars, LED lamps, mattress vacuum, electric face-lift and firming device, nipple tape, multi-port wall chargers, cellphone holder, nose rings, etc. 

Crack

Photo by Camila Quintero Franco on Unsplash

My anxiety is peeking through the crevices once again. I only had two hours of sleep last night⁠⁠—a tell-tale sign that I’m not okay. 

Prior to this pandemic, I’ve never had a serious bout with anxiety that went on for months. Back then, after wallowing for a few days or weeks at most, I’d usually just pick myself up and move on like nothing happened. 

Right now, times have changed, and “not feeling okay” is something that everyone is feeling—even for people you’ve known all your life to be well-rounded, cheery, and easy-going. In my case, I feel this more often now and it has been going on. I just don’t have the energy to do anything other than the things I had to do out of obligation.